January… "new year, new you!” Insert eye roll, and pass me the Oreos.
Fact number one about me: I have never been [and probably never will be] successful at keeping New Year’s resolutions. To be honest, I don’t think I’ve kept one past mid-February [at best], ever. The truth is, as much as I know I’m not going to “shed that baby weight” by implementing a workout and clean eating program, I always find that I’m silently promising myself that ‘this year I’ll get around to it,’ whatever 'it' may be in that particular season.
A fellow mama posted an interesting idea to Facebook that encouraged me to follow suit. Rather than choosing a resolution last year, she challenged herself with choosing one word for the whole year. The reference she gave is linked to this post, Jon Gordon’s : One Word. I have not read this book yet, but it’s on my list for 2018. Over the past few weeks, I have been reflecting on the word I would choose for 2018, and in that process, was able to better understand why I fail every year at my previously made resolutions.
- I am a new[ish] mom. At what age does that adjective expire? Our daughter is almost two. I still feel new. -ish. New or seasoned, momming takes time.
- I have a full-time job. Eight to five. Five [sometimes six] days per week. 52 weeks per year. Time. In this season, Nick and I are both working. We are sharing the responsibilities of both, financial contribution and keeping of the home. Side note, my husband rocks. He works and cooks. He cleans and plays. We both share it all, in this season. It’s just where we are right now.
- I am a wife. The guilt I put on myself for being a working mom, creates in me the tendency to overcompensate for time lost by only being 'mom' during the “awake” hours. I would need an entire post dedicated to this issue alone. Our day usually runs on autopilot…we co-parent in the mornings, put on our professional face for 8-9 hours, co-parent again for dinner, bath, pjs, and prayers…and then we both roll up our sleeves to get the chores done. We dedicate very little time to just being each other’s spouse. That’s a problem, one that we are working through. It requires time.
- I am a believer. It may say something about me that this is listed fourth, but hey…transparency. As believers and followers of Jesus, God calls us to spend time with Him, in His word. A task that I should [and try to] put at the very top of my priority list. Through our church, we are a part of a community group that meets once per week, mid-week. We are invested in these people and the time we spend in fellowship with them. Community is important to us. Fellowship and worship are necessary parts of our week. We choose to make time for those things.
I am a daughter, a sister, a friend…fill in whatever blanks are left with the time it takes to be a semi-decent each of the above. And I know I could do a better job at all of it. Thank the good Lord above that my weakness is what qualifies me for salvation.
The roles I have in this season require my time. Time that I want to put in, that I’m responsible for. And while I know it isn’t the case for everyone, for me…focusing my attention on resolutions that don’t already align with those roles ... is impossible. That’s why I fail when I try to add more tasks... time is something I am selfishly guarding for my family, because that’s where we are right now, and that’s what they need from me most, in this season.
So bringing us back to the One Word Challenge. My favorite part about this challenge is the beautiful word - ‘one.’ One word to focus on…one word to incorporate into my life…into my relationships…into areas I’m already investing time. It took me weeks to think about a word that didn't overwhelm me with more doing. I really wanted a word that changes the way I do the things I’m already doing.
Last week, we started a new series at our church, ‘engage.’ Cue light bulb. Engage.
Engage in the time I have with my daughter. Put my phone down, get off of social media, the dishes can wait, the mess is fine. It’s fine.
Engage my colleagues at work. I spend more hours per day with my coworkers than I do with my family. How can I be more intentional in how I connect with them on a daily basis? I think all too often I discount the time I spend at work as time that counts. I dismiss opportunities that may be there every day, because I’m “at work.” Engage.
Engage in time with my husband, even in the midst of our monotonous schedule each week.
Engage my community, members of my church. Engage in quality, quiet, uninterrupted time with Jesus. My focus needs to shift from simply doing, checking the boxes of going to church, attending community group, reading my Bible…to engaging. Make the most of those moments and truly connect with those already in my life.
No comments:
Post a Comment